When you least expect it….

2016 Started of as a normal year, my continues fight to raise awareness about endometriosis, my emotional battle with infertility, a new much more demanding job, especially because it is so new to me.  Yes, 2016 also started off with loads of pregnancy announcements, and all though I am always happy to hear that someone is expecting, my heart would break inside, because it seems like our dream will just never come true.

 

On the 15th of February 2016 I posted my dad’s story, about how endometriosis has affected him, but most of all about how it broke his heart to know that Vic and I might never be parents. His letter was viewed over 800 times, which means it is reaching people.

I have not been to well. I have been in pain for several weeks now, and ended up in the ER on the 16th February.  Off course they couldn’t pick anything up, including that my appendix looks normal, now I found this quite funny and scary to be honest, you see my appendix was removed in 1997, so I was wondering what they were seeing.  Friday the 19th I ended up at my GP, because now I was hit by flu, and felt so terrible I got my meds, and by Sunday I was feeling so much better, but the pain just has not subsided.  Monday the 22nd February my Endo Specialists rooms phoned me and said they have an appointment available for me on Tuesday 23rd February.  I was so happy, because you wait for months to get an appointment with him.  So I got up, felt so uncomfortable with the pain but hoping at the same time, that I will not be told that its all in my head.

I love my doctor, he is so straight forward, and I love how he can chat to a person and make you feel comfortable. He asked me what was wrong, and I just let go, saying to him that I have been in so much pain, and that I have been feeling a lump under my laparotomy cut which has been causing a lot of pain.  He is sitting their listening to me and writing down everything I tell him.  He looks at my photos of my surgery last year, and he says, lets go and see what the sonagram says.

While he is doing the scan, he says to me, everything looks normal, your uterus looks normal, but sjoe, your endometrium is very thick. When was your last period??? And I am lying on the bed, trying to remember, and all I could remember is that it was around the end of January.  Then he asks, when is your next period? And i answer him with, oh I was supposed to start yesterday, but have not yet.  He looks at me, and says… well before we do anything else, we need to do a bloodtest.  Now, if you have followed my story, you will know by now how I feel about these tests…. I hate them, because they are always negative.

Before I left his office, I asked him the prices for IVF, so that we can start looking at saving up some money again for our next round.  He printed it out and said, I dont think you will be needing this, but here you go.

I’m walking down the passage on my way to the lab, and I am thinking, damn, I don’t even want to do this test.  But before I know it, I am inside the lab and waiting my turn.

I missed my doctors phone call, but received the weirdest sms from him, so I phoned back immediately.  He scolds me, and says why am I walking around, and I answer I am at work doctor, he tells me to sit down, and that I do, now my heart is pumping,  and then the words…. YOU ARE PREGNANT.  The first time ever I have heard these words, I ask him are you serious and he says yes, yes, you are pregnant, and then I just burst out crying, I couldn’t even finish my conversation. I was just so overwhelmed. My body was shaking, my hands were trembling, tears were just running down my face. Then it hits me, I have to phone Victor.

I think Victor was just as shocked as I was, but to hear the happiness in his voice was just so wonderful. He kept asking me if its true, are we really going to be parents.

I just had to see it with my own eyes, so that afternoon I bought a pregnancy test…. and there it is…. I am pregnant! My first ever positive pregnancy test.